What happens when you say and feel that you need someone and then they go

Louise was such a warm, bubbly, loving person. You always hear good about those that die, especially those that die young. In this case I swear on my life this is true. And if it true in all the other cases too, which I have no reason to believe is not the case, then thats a fucked up world in which we're living. But I'm not going to take this blog in that direction, at least not today. May be another day if I feel like it.

Louise had the ability to make friends quickly and at the same time make deep lasting friendships. She would be considered best friends with quite a few girls and someone who could be trusted with the most private and personal confidences. I first saw her in a nightclub queue, she was elegant and dressed in black as always and was laughing with her cousins over from France.

One evening we were in her favourite pub, The Swan, and my brother had wheeled out his new girlfriend. It was hustling and bustling and people filtered in from work on a Friday evening. We were a group of about 15 and the new girl didn't know anyone at the table. Louise started talking and within 5 minutes the new girl turned to my brother and said, 'she's so lovely. She's amazing'. To which my brother, jokingly replied, 'hey what about me, I'm nice, I'm friendly!'. She could make people love her immediately.

I don't know what it was that she had exactly, but she wanted to be liked. I think this comes from her upbringing and family circumstances that making friends was vitally important. She was chatty, funny, bubbly and positive so I suppose who wouldn't want to be around her. I don't know what she saw in me really, I'm not like that at all. More groucho than hello but whatever it was that she liked, she really liked it and we made a great team. I'd say partners in crime, but Louise was as straight laced as they come, so perhaps soulmates is a better way to describe it.